Satchidananda Murtaye

So, remember a few blogs back, I told you about how we are tearing apart the Anusara Invocation line by line each week in hot yoga class?


This is the second line: Satchidananda Murtaye 

There are a total of 4 lines in the Invocation.
The 3 remaining lines of the Invocation describe the inner teacher.
The first line asked "Who are you?"  Answer: You are your highest teacher.

Satchidananda Murtaye: "Who assumes the forms of Reality, Consciousness and Bliss"

The word 'murtaye' is often shortened to murti. A murti is a form or figure.

A murti gives a form to that which is formless so that we can better understand it.

Artists explain things through sculpture, music and paintings.  Poets explain things through metaphors, etc...to help us understand.  'Every color, placement and paint stroke, musical note and word has a purpose. These give form and explanation so that the stories and teachings can be shared over and over.'

Therefore, the formless inner teacher now takes a form.

Sat = Truth
Chit = Ultimate Knowledge/Consciousness
Ananda = Bliss

 It takes the form of Truth, Ultimate Knowledge/Consciousness, and Bliss.

What do these things look like?  Good question.

We are the outer form of our inner teacher.  The form is You!  Every bone, hair, and blemish.

You can actively choose to do as you wish with your form.

In Anusara Yoga, this form we choose to take could be a certain pose.  Or the form could be an offering to The Devine.  For me personally, I want my outer form to show my inner teacher.  I want to learn from that mirror of me and put the best me forward.  I want to shine my light and help others to shine theirs.  I want to be a nice person and be genuinely kind. I want to have an open heart and an open mind. I want to be loving.  I want to be stress free. I want to take care of my form...it is all I get...I am a temple.

What form will you decide to take?

This is one of my favorite songs by Switchfoot!  It is called the Economy of Mercy. I really like it.  This line of the Invocation kind of made me think about these lyrics a bit for some reason:

"There's just two ways to lose yourself in this life
And neither way is safe
In my dreams I see visions of the future
But today we have today
And where will I find You?

In the economy of mercy
I am a poor and begging man
In the currency of Grace
Is where my song begins
In the colors of Your goodness
In the scars that mark your skin
In the currency of Grace
Is where my song begins

These carbon shells
These fragile dusty frames
House canvases of souls
We are bruised and broken masterpieces
But we did not paint ourselves
And where will I find You?

Where was I when the world was made?
Where was I?

I'm lost without You here
Yes, I'm lost without You near me
I'm lost without You here
You knew my name when the world was made"

To me, this song has several meanings.  I won't go into all of those here.  However, I'm lost without my inner teacher.  I am lost without spirit and without grace.  We did not paint ourselves, true, but we can still choose our form.

Thank you, Dara, once again!!!

Thought this was kinda of funny this morning...

After an awesome weekend of climbing for 3 days straight and passing a lead fall test and leading some, I go to work this morning, and I find this in my inbox:

"First, choose from the options that thrill you.
Then, choose the ones that also teach you.
And from these, Sue, choose the scariest.
Butterflies in your tummy are good,
The Universe"

2 miles!!!

I ran 2 miles this evening!

I've been doing squats lately, and they are helping. My legs feel like they can actually work and carry me. However, I am done at 2 miles though. Whew!

Squats and dips in the morning!

Man, it feels good to see results!

OM Namah Shivaya Gurave

Last Friday night's hot yoga class, we discussed this first line of the Anusara Invocation.

This month, my friend and instructor, Dara Brown, is breaking it down line by line. Thanks Dara!

This first line of the invocation means: I offer myself to the Light, the Auspicious One, who is the True Teacher within and without.

OM means God is within you. "Om is the one eternal syllable of which all that exists is but the development. The past, the present, and the future are all included in this one sound, and all that exists beyond the three forms of time is also implied in it"
Om is also a symbol of grace.

Namah Shivaya Gurave is actually a question. It asks, "who are you?", and it answers "You are the highest teacher."

This was important to me to learn this, not just b/c I have been singing the invocation now before classes for a couple of months, but b/c I want to be a teacher of sorts.

I want to help rehab persons in the near future, and I also want to be a personal coach or trainer soon.

The best quality of a teacher, is one who turns the mirror back on to you...to show you your best potential. To show you YOU! These are the ones who tear down your walls. They want to see you improve and do your best.

This is also the quality I am looking for in a soul mate. Someone who challenges me to be my highest self...never compromising my integrity.

Who are YOU i ask?

Do you line up with your highest teacher?

Stone Summit trip report

Well, I was wanting to get out to Whitesides in NC this weekend and follow Ben on the OR.
However, the forecast was crap.

It is my Spring Break after all, so I wanted to climb. So I went to the largest indoor crag called Stone Summit. It is located in Atlanta, GA.

I'm only a little under 3 hrs away from there. Most of the crags I go to outside are the same distance if not more. I figured, what the hell???

This place was awesome!

There was a little girl in there leading all of these super hard routes. She was only like 10 years old. She was awesome to watch.
I took a pic of her coach belaying her. It was really inspiring to see these little kids in there with their coaches. The coaches were big time too I suppose b/c they had jackets on that read, "USA Climbing" on them.

This guy was pretty awesome too:

My friend, Paul.

This place is freaking huge! It is the perfect, crappy weather place...literally, it is an indoor crag!!!

See why I want to lead? I really want to lead in this gym.
It has tons of moderate routes I can lead at my grade ability. I could really learn to lead here.

Bouldering area:

My friends are down there somewhere:

There they are!!! Yay!

Of course I had to take a panoramic pic!

Paul leading:

There is a wall that moves too. They move it to make it incline, and the routes are set for speed climbing. They didn't have it set up though. I remember asking Paul about that wall. I asked, "What is that lady doing there?" He says, "Oh yeah, that's the speed climbing wall." Then we both looked at the route and looked at each other and said at the same time, "Um, well, she's not speed climbing..." LOL!!! (sorry)

An adult's jungle gym:

Underneath that red carpet is the track for the lift that helps carry the buckets of holds up for the route setters. Really cool, heh?

They have gym equipment here as well and yoga classes.

The kids climbing areas are awesome too! There is a dinosaur they climb on, and it has a slide too!

I had a blast climbing here Sunday!

I failed my lead test though. I'll get it next time. I really would like to start leading. It is very frustrating that I'm not. I mean, I have already led some stuff, even outdoors. I want to lead at this gym though. I just think it is a great place to learn.

In order to lead here, you have to fall on a lead test. It was frustrating b/c I was very nervous. Then I didn't want to let go and, just as usual. I mean, who really wants to fall? You fall if you have to sometimes. But who really just wants to be that careless and be falling all the time on lead. I don't! Others learn by falling and I respect that. I however, don't want to be that kind of climber that pushes that hard to where I take falls like that. I personally will never lead anything out of my grade level range. That's just me.

I screamed on the way down. It wasn't pretty. They failed me on my test for multiple reasons.
Oh well, not the end of the world. However, it is a little frustrating and disappointing.

I get so scared on lead...now you want me to fall on purpose? Wow!


I ran 1.7 miles tonight without stopping to walk! Yay! I was hoping for 2 miles. I'll get it next time. All of these squats I am doing are really helping I can tell.
:-)

Low days exist to remind you that you still have choices.
High days, Sue, exist to remind you of how fast you rebound... among other things.
Boing,
The Universe

Another blog post on training...

john colver

I love this blog!!!

Train Harder - Gain More Results? Err… Maybe? by John Colver

Train Harder - Gain More Results? Err… Maybe?

As I am "training" for my life...just want to be fit for life's upcoming events so I can participate in them...I am reading this blog by John Colver.

This is a really good blog post!

Pain Makes Couch Potatoes

I have FMS and PFS, not major conditions...they are not degenerative nor will they cause death. However, it causes a lot of chronic pain.

Another reason I want to help others...I have chronic pain, so I know what it feels like.

Pain makes couch potatoes! I know, b/c I used to be one. I've had my days from laying around.
I mean, I walked and jogged a little back in the day and as I got into my mid 20s, I was able to afford to go to the gym, so I did. But I was always in pain.

Even in high school, I was in pain...all the time. My body was never the same after I had a terrible bout of MONO my junior year of high school.

Growing up, my sister and I were always so active...we even did basketball camps, etc. in middle school. I loved track and field when I was in the 6th grade. Our parents had us in tap dance and acrobats, etc. They took us camping and hiking all the time. We were always camping at the beach too. They even let us take swim lessons and join the pool membership every summer! We rode our bicycles around everywhere as a kid! I even remember one summer when Mom enrolled me and Gayle (my twin sister) into an aerobics class...it was a summer long class on the weekend.

In high school, it all stopped. I got lazy or got in the wrong crowd.

My freshman year of college, i lived on campus and had no car. I had to walk everywhere! I even worked out at the campus gym and even took body sculpting classes. I went camping and hiking that year some. After that, I turned 21 and could legally drink and party. So I did. My exercise turned into going to raves and dancing from 11pm to 11am the next day! I was really good at dancing. Glow sticks and all! Hahahaha Seriously, I was good at it. It was aerobic too. I always remember my knees hurting all the time from dancing. My favorite room was the break dancing...and drumb and bass. I always wanted to learn how to break dance but never did. I was also not taking care of my body though...eating terrible back then and not getting enough rest!

At age 25, I was settled down by now, out of college and working. I was sort of a couch potato, but i still liked to power walk and go out occasionally to club. I started meeting some people who were active, and I wanted to get out more. But I would hurt all the time. It would make me just want to lay in bed. I finally went to a rheumatologist who diagnosed me with FMS. He told me that most people with FMS are usually disabled by their 30s. He wrote me a prescription for some Flexeril and told me to take advil.

When he diagnosed me, I didn't even understand FMS. No one did. They still don't really. At least they know more about it now. I started my own research. That was when I joined a gym for the first time. I was 26.

I found that exercise really helped me feel better!

An old friend of mine and I used to work out together every day at the gym. We power walked together too. We were really motivated and exercising all the time too. I started feeling really good all the time. I even starting getting muscles. I remember she got a second job at night and worked out less and less and then we never worked anymore together.

I still went to the gym, but it wasn't the same w/o a partner. It was really hard to get motivated. Then my boyfriend (at the time) and I got a puppy. Needless to say, my working out came to a hault. I would come home from work to let the puppy out and feed him....and then never went back out. I was also in school at night as well at this point too. I sorta stopped working out. I was studying a lot.

When I hit 30, my aches and pains started coming back again. The boyfriend and I weren't together anymore after 5 years, and I started going out and staying up late...leading an unhealthy lifestyle. It felt similar to college, except not as crazy! I laid around a lot feeling sort of down and in pain a lot...probably depressed. I slept a ton too.

I was tired of hurting. I was tired of the way I was living and tired of my boring life! I was existing and that was it.

I started reading a lot of books. I wanted to be a different person and change my life. Life to me, had no meaning behind it.

I joined back up at the gym again in 2006. This is when I started doing yoga a lot. Trying to work out again. The same gym where I was doing yoga classes has a climbing wall. In 2007, that is when I tried climbing. I was scared of it at first and wasn't sure if I would ever go back. But I did. And I ended up loving it! Now I climb a lot, and it is something I could not imagine never doing anymore.

Unfortunately for me, climbing is really hard on your body. Having FMS and not being previously conditioned for a sport like this, later on, I started having issues with pain again. My knees mostly...and shoulders and neck. I figured out that you have to train your opposites with any sport...and that you have to condition your body as a whole. I've learned so much since I started climbing about my body! And I have also learned it from Anusara Yoga. Most folks would probably already know all of this, but not me. I had never been into sports. I wasn't aware of how bad I was treating my body.

I sought physical therapy in Spring 2010 for my knees. I learned so much. And I also found that what I was learning was so interesting. I wanted to know more. I also wanted to feel better and do more and push myself in ways that I've never done my whole life. Fear, anxiety and pain had constantly held me back for so long.

I have also in the course of several years sought some therapy. Getting to the root of emotional issues also helps. A lot of pain is brought on by emotional problems.

I used to just lay around all the time, because it hurt to move. Now it hurts when I lay around. I want to move constantly. Hell, if it is gonna hurt on a couch, why not just get up and move? Moving is better.

Regular exercise is key for physical and mental health. It also helps keep muscles strong, and your bones need strong muscles. They help support each other. I also don't want Osteoarthritis and other things as I get older. Strong muscles help make your bones stronger!

I have gone back through and read a lot of my old blog posts here. Wow! I sure have come a long way. I also found some old posts where I wrote about how I didn't know what my purpose was here in life and how I felt confused as to what my calling was.

I can look back at all the people I have met along this journey since I decided to change my course, and I have met some really inspiring people. People who inspired me to want and go get a better life!

Oddly enough, here I am going back to school now. Wow!!!

I doubt that pain really makes couch potatoes! I am quite sure it is the other way around now!

6 AM this morning: Running = Fail

However, I managed to:

10 push-ups
4 sets of 20 dips
3 sets of 50 scissor kicks. My scissor kicks were the ones with opposite arm reaches for opposite toe.
50 squats where when i squatted, my arms came up in the air kind of in front of my face and then lowered them as i came up out of the squat, and I did them relatively fast. These are great...I should do these more often!

Update this evening at 7:00: I ran at 6:00. Yay! Got 1 mile in and a bit of walking this evening...

best full body workout ever!

I have no clue what my body is going to feel like in the morning!

I did a mud run 1 hr. training class this morning, even though I am not doing the Mud Run this year! Why would I torture myself like that? Because it is fun!!!

It was a pretty large group there this morning. And I learned how to do Burpees this morning! HARD!!!

I can't even begin to explain all of what we did.

I performed better on the running part than I thought I would.

I'm getting stronger holding planks. We had to hold a plank then lower into elbow/forearms planks w/o bending the knees. I did it! You have to keep switching it back and forth until she calls time. And if anyone dropped or sunk, we all had to start over!

I did push-ups again. I still have to do them on my knees though.

I had to run up and down a hill carrying a really big rock until she called time.

My pull-ups sucked! I couldn't even get one unassisted! :(
(These were true pull-ups...not like little iron gym things I do at home)

My lunges are getting better!!! :-)
My jumps are too.

We had to do squats and jump squats. The trainer, Virginia, told us to "make sure your knees don't come over your ankles guys". As she said that, I was thinking, "Jeez, I hate it when trainers say that! What does that really mean? It doesn't help me squat better!" Right as I was thinking that, she says, "dig your heels into the ground...get heavy in your heel folks and come off your toes a little and stick your butt out". I did what she said, and was happy! I now know how to do a squat. Guess what? My knees didn't hurt!!! Even my physical therapist didn't even tell me that! I hate it when trainers think that by telling you not to put your knee over your ankle means that you should know how to squat properly.

I was really good at crab crawls and bear crawls.

I'm used to doing low dips. As in....like on a park bench. We had to weight our palms and then dip hovering over the obstacle with feet off ground. I couldn't even feel anything in my triceps (I really need work there) My shoulders ached doing it. I really don't like those.

We did Burpees!!! They are hard, but not that bad.......I am slow at them. But I did them all though so...

We had to get into plank pose and keeping our legs straight walk with hands across the parking lot. Then when finished, you had to go backwards. Really pushing into the hands.

Note to self: I SUCK AT JUMP ROPING!!! MUST GO BUY JUMP ROPE NOW!!!

I was great on my scissors and my crunches.....i hate doing abs. I always pull muscles in my neck when doing ab workouts! I already have really bad issues with tension in my neck. When I do abs, I cannot for the life of me, relax my neck and just use my chest to pull up. My chest is so weak. But I did really good today, but i could tell my neck was stressed. We will see how it feels tomorrow.

We had to push a tire over and over and over.....you get the picture!

Then James and I had to grab a tire together. I carried one side and he carried the other. We had to run with it across a big parking lot and then back. I noticed some folks were bending at the elbow using their biceps to carry the tire. Basically, they were locking off! I know as a climber, you shouldn't lock off like that. I don't even carry my groceries that way! LOL I kept my arms straight, not hyper extended though. I only had to use my finger tips. I did ok, but it was towards the end, so my endurance was failing.

Wow, I can't even remember what else we did to blog about it. It was a really tough workout this morning! And they serve protein shakes there. So James bought me a banana/peanut butter, sugar free shake!!! It made me miss Jamba Juice in Cali.

Ok, I have stretched, and now I'm off to read about the rest of the integumentary system and about bones.

See ya.

8:15 AM tomorrow...what will you be doing???

http://bodyshopathletics.com/saturday-workouts/

This is what I'm doing!!!

4 elements to success:

1. To be physically in shape

2. To be mentally focused

3. To have emotional balance

4. To be spiritually sound

My eyes watered with joy this morning after I opened an envelope from my mailbox

"My Daughter,
What I Love About You:

I love the spirit of you...
the grace with which you welcome each challenge,
the childlike wonder that still colors your days.

I love the originality of you...
your willingness to stand out from the crowd...
your unique perspective on what's happening in the world
and in your life.

I love the wisdom of you...
the way you trust your intuition...
your unfailing commitment to doing the right thing.

And most of all, I love the heart of you...
the genuine compassion, empathy, and friendship
you offer everyone you know.

I guess it's pretty clear...
I love everything about you.

And on your birthday, I'm wishing
joy and blessings to you,
my beautiful daughter and friend."


Happy Birthday, Susan.
We Love You!
- Dad and Mom

Happy Birthday to me!

:-)

I did it! I ran this morning.

I ran 1 mile this morning at 6 AM. I also did 10 push-ups (the girly ones) and 15 assisted pull-ups.

I need to figure out a better pull up system though, b/c my heels rest on the back of a chair at the top of it. I don't push though just rest them there. So basically, I'm sort of laying down in the air pulling up. My arms are long though, I don't lock off, I go all the way back down...and I feel like my core is strong and working. I guess it is almost like I am in push-up pose but on my back in the air instead? Of course, my arms felt like they were gonna fall off. I remember a long time ago when I could do that for much longer. I'll get it back!

I'm going to do my daily dozen at lunch!!!

the new challenge

Tomorrow is my 36 year birthday!

I start tomorrow morning off with 10 pushups and 10 pullups. Then I will run 1 mile.

Wish me luck!!! I've been studying all night for a histology exam that I have tomorrow!

My friend James and I have started a challenge to keep us both motivated. I am in school and cannot work out on a regular schedule with him like I used to. And my new schedule would mean going it alone. James has been putting off working out, b/c I'm not there with him. We usually do stuff together.

We have decided to do a 6 am challenge.

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda...

I am not a morning person and never have been. It has always been hard getting up.

Even back in middle school and high school....I remember Mom coming in and waking us up, and I would just sit up in the bed under my covers not wanting to move. It seemed so hard to want to start the day.

In my 30's, I subconsciously hit the snooze button several times before it kicks in that "My alarm clock is going off"! And the only time I seem to never hit snooze and jump out of bed at the sound of the alarm is when I am getting up for a climbing trip! Imagine that!!! Or last summer when I started power walking tons of miles with my friend Anne. Knowing that she would be at my house, I would HAVE to be up and ready. Also, I started liking the way i felt to have walked 8-12 miles already before 10 am. I felt great and had the rest of my day to go still!

Anyway, now I have learned myself well, so I've started this new thing where I set my alarm clock for 10 minutes earlier than what I wanted to get up for. If I want to be up at 6 am, I set my alarm for 5:50. That way, I subconsciously hit snooze for 10 minutes, and then I suddenly realize it is 6 am and time to get up. It has been working.

However, I am still finding myself saying, "I really WANT to be able to go running at 6 am." I'm still not though.

I am no longer saying, "I wish I could get up at 6 am."; "I wish I could go run in the mornings before work."; "I wish I could run at 6 am."

No, I am now saying, "I WANT to run at 6 am." I started this for the new year 2011. I shall say I want versus saying I wish, or I should have, etc.

I have even taken a "sleep better" yoga workshop.

At the end of last summer, I bought a t-shirt from the yoga studio that reads, "I like who I am when I try." Some folks say you shouldn't try to do things just do. There is no try just do. Well, maybe in emergency situations where your life is at stake, there is no try...it's "must do". But for the rest of your life as it may be from day to day, if you never first try then you will never do at all. Right???

I tried eating Sushi again in 2007 and discovered that I really do like some of it. Now I am eating it. See?

I don't want to do things half-ass. How many things are you doing each day that are just half-ass? If you don't "try", it means you are doing it half-ass. You've got to really try! Really push yourself and want something. I really do like myself better when I try. It goes back to that old saying of, "How will know if you like something if you never try it?"

So every moring this year, I have "tried" to get up early to go run. It hasn't happened. But guess what? Other things have!!!

I snooze for 10 minutes, then get up at 6, and go to the bathroom. By then, my dog is barking to go out b/c he hears me. I go let him out and immediately go into the kitchen to grind my coffee beans and make a breakfast. I let my dog back in and feed him. It is now 6:15 or 6:20. Now I am awake. I still can't make myself go run. However, I load the dishes into the dishwasher or empty them, whichever. I put a load of clothes in the washer or take a load out of the dryer from the night before. Wow, I'm more awake now. The coffee is tasting good, and I find myself opening up my text book for school and I begin to study. It is now 6:30 or 6:45. I read and study until 8:00. I throw on clothes for work, and then I'm out the door. (Oh, I take my showers and stuff the night before...showers relax me, they don't wake me up)

Guess what? I have been getting to work on time. Wow! This never happens. I am always late to work in the mornings.

I'm getting all of this other stuff done in the mornings now, making some time for other stuff later in the day. I'm in a good mood at work when I get there and not still half asleep! My days are better...I get more done now than ever. I have more energy. And I'm falling asleep better and staying asleep. Feeling rested.

They say it only takes 2 weeks to get a routine in place. Mine was more like 2 months, but I'm getting closer to my goal.

I WANT to run in the mornings before work. It will happen.