January 22, 2009 - Insanity is my Sanity

Everyone has quirks and little issues they deal with on a day to day basis. Everyone has to have some sort of vice to deal with everything that is handed down to them or shoved onto them.

One of those things that gets shoved on me a lot is fear. I have a lot of them. I have a lot of anxiety and self-doubt. I actually am starting to realize that I am normal though. If you don't have anxiety or self-doubts or get depressed ever or anything that society labels as "abnormal", then you are really the abnormal one, not me.

I am normal. :)

Or maybe the normal ones are just really dumbfounded...

Therefore my insanity IS my sanity!

AND I do things to overcome fears...and anxieties...and depression...sometimes my lows last longer than my highs...So I keep doing those things that make me high. And I keep doing those things that seem too physically challenging for someone like me...those things my rheumatologist told me I wouldn't be able to do.

I like to put myself in places that scare me. I want to feel what it is like. I want to see things and learn new things and evolve into a new person.

For those of you that read my blog that climb, you know what I am talking about. Or for those of you who have other vices in your life, you as well know what I'm talking about!

I found climbing a little over a year and a half ago. I think it saved my life. As well as some of the other things I am trying out now. I like putting myself out there and just to see what becomes of me. What can I learn this time about myself?

One of my goals for 2009 was to get on some ice. I have never ice climbed before. Of course, this was my first time and it was on top rope. It was awesome fun, and I ended up loving the hell out of it! :)

It was pretty damn cold...even though we were just at 215 in NC and top roping.

Yes, there's this hwy where ice comes in and everyone goes there to climb in NC. It looked pretty busy, just like a top rope crag does. However, it was actually nice b/c our guide knew a lot of the folks there. So we got to hop on a ton of routes already set up! I actually saw some folks I knew there too. It was awesome.

This is a crampon. It goes on the bottom of your boots, so you can climb on the ice:

See:

I learned a lot out there...it was fun too. Everyone I saw and met were all in good moods. They seemed so full of life. I didn't want the day to end. It was very uplifting.

Starting up my first route of the day:

Awesome fun! It was better than a punching bag! Instead it was like I was stabbing into ice...well, I was, really! lol I wish I could do it every time I had a bad day at work! lol

My hands and toes got so cold! When you come down, the blood rushes back into arms and you can get the screaming barfies. lol

It is really painful when the blood starts coming back into your arms and wrists. It's like needles being stabbed into your arms and toes. I would just keep moving my arms around to help the blood flow faster, etc. and keep warm. It helped a lot.

This was an amazing day!

I'm not sure if I want to do anything more than this on ice just yet. I'm not really a cold weather person...so me having tried this, was a feat in and of itself!

Yay! I tried it though...:)

"You'll never know unless you try."